Moving Sophie

I tried to give myself as much a chance for rest in the morning as I could, trying to fight off this encroaching pneumonia. It seemed to start shortly after I got my tooth drilled out on Wednesday, making me wonder if that might have spread some bacteria or something. I am absolutely sick of being sick. I did manage to avoid coughing and sneezing too much at last night's dinner, but things only seem to be getting worse. And it's funny as how many of my friends have been recently inquiring after my health, I realise I'm a terrible sick person, as I can't stop complaining about it! I'm sure some people just go with the stiff upper lip and grin and bear it, while I just turn into a miserable wreck and moan and complain until I feel better. I really hope I get better soon, because I'm sure I'm trying the patience of all of my friends.

At noon however, I got out of bed, gathered my squash gear, and made my way to the club to play squash with Sophie at 2 PM. We had a good run, and at one point Sophie made such a valiant effort juggling a ball in the air (complete with her hands) that I laughed so much I gave her the point and the game. Sophie loses a lot, so I think it made her feel better to win one, even slightly illegally!

After the game, we got changed and I showed Sophie a message I had received from a boy from the Lansdowne from the night before. (This was the same one who had mistaken my friendliness for interest a few weeks back and messaged me that night too).

Your name came up in conversation tonight. I hear that you often wear suspenders to the club and that the other night wasn't special.

And before you ask no I didn't mention that I saw them the other night, and I can't remember who it was who told me that this was the case.

Hope your well. See you soon. With or without suspenders depending on the date.

Clueless Boy

PS still don't have your number.

Given that Sophie knows the boy in question, she just absolutely doubled over laughing. And that's what I love about Sophie, is that she just knows me so well, she knows this particular boy doesn't have a chance in hell with me. I don't even have to say it out loud, but it just makes us both giggle. Oh, and I dearly hope that this boy realises why I haven't given him my number yet... I feel terrible to be so mean, but what am I supposed to do? There's just no way I'd ever be into this boy.

Afterwards, she needed to fix her bed at her old flat, so I came with her to Putney, where we found a little restaurant to have lunch. (One thing about Sophie is that she seems to know great little places to eat almost everywhere!) I had a vegetarian pastry while she had some soup, and we basically chatted about boys the entire time. She was a bit annoyed at Witty Windsor Boy, who hadn't been texting her back as frequently as she would like. After all, with him leaving for Dubai soon, she's been trying to keep her schedule open so she will have time to spend with him, but he's been terrible about making plans.

And I had to laugh, because I totally understand Sophie's frustration about the entire situation. We both see ourselves as competent, even-tempered, emotionally stable girls, and then we find ourselves absolutely obsessing over a boy. What is up with that? I felt a bit bad, because even as she was moaning about Witty Windsor Boy not texting and practically deciphering every text he sent, the Tall South African was texting me and attempting to call me (I had to tell him I couldn't talk since I was with Sophie), basically just being the super-attentive boy that she wished Witty Windsor Boy would be.

Yet, I can absolutely understand where she is coming from, for goodness knows I have done my fair share of stressing out about the Tall South African. And it drives me crazy too, to know that a boy can make me, one of the most self-confident girls in the world, feel anxious and desperately seek his reassurance and approval. How on earth can we be so in control of so many aspects of our lives, and then some boy comes waltzing into the picture and we turn into blithering idiots?

Although to be fair, my relationship with the Tall South African is somewhat different to what she has going with Witty Windsor Boy. As I put it to Sophie, I know that there is no way the Tall South African is calling other girls every day, texting them constantly, and just keeping up the level of emotional connection that he has with me. (And if he is, he has far too much time on his hands!) Yet, because we are not in the same place, I certainly don't expect any fidelity from him, and hope he doesn't expect any fidelity from me. (As I put it to her, "One has to stay entertained somehow!") So when she asked if I would be upset to see him flirting with another girl in a bar, I could honestly tell her I wouldn't, because while he might find another girl temporarily attractive, I know that his deepest emotional connection is with me, and I'm the most important girl in his life from that perspective. I'd really only be upset if I felt I were being usurped emotionally. Temporary flirtations however? He surely has them, as I do too. And I think we know that, and it's why our relationship works for us. We're focused on the more important bits.

This seemed to intrigue Sophie, and she was one of the first people I've really been able to articulate this to, that our relationship isn't the "all or nothing" of a completely platonic friendship, or an all-in romantic relationship. It's a "third way" that at least for now, seems to meet our emotional and personal needs. Of course that might change in time for either one of us, but at least at this point, it seems to be working. Goodness knows, the Tall South African doesn't cause me nearly as much agony and distress as Witty Windsor Boy does for Sophie, so I have to figure we're doing something right... I feel like Sophie and Witty Windsor Boy are going for too much a traditional relationship, but because of their circumstances (with him leaving for Dubai), it just isn't quite working. I do hope they can figure something out though, because they are both lovely people, who do actually seem rather fond of each other...

As we were eating lunch, we kept hearing shouts from a nearby pub, and realised that we had been missing watching the rugby. The ups and downs were getting so intense that we started tracking the game on our phones to figure out what all of the cheering and yelling was about, and then I had a good time teasing the Tall South African about it, as he'd completely forgotten to watch!

We checked our phones and realised that England had lost the game (apparently due to a last-minute try by Wales), so we figured it wasn't worth checking out any post-game action, and instead made our way to Sophie's flat to fix her bed and clear out her room. I was shocked when I arrived at what a tiny room it turned out to be, I think smaller than almost anywhere I've ever lived previously. She did a bad job of trying to glue the support posts on her bed, until I popped out the broken bits and figured out how to just glue them together properly, matching up the broken bits to each other. In retrospect, I wonder why she didn't just remove the supports in the first place, instead of moving the bed and breaking them. But as Sophie said to me as I figured out how to fix everything, "This is why I brought you along, you're so clever!"

We cleaned out the tiny room, vacuuming everything and moving the bed back into a corner, and then made our way downstairs to pick up a few things to move. I was surprised at what a tiny bungalow the whole place seemed, and just made me a bit claustrophobic. It was just so obviously the kind of "cheap house" that somebody attempting to get a first grasp on the property ladder but who doesn't quite have the money for it buys. I'm surprised that she lasted so long living there, I never would have managed it.

We then walked to her new flat, which was a million times better. A much larger and spacious room, as well as plenty of common spaces for entertaining and very pleasant-seeming flatmates. Lots of attic storage, and just a more open and airy feeling. I definitely think she did well in her move, and will likely be much happier in her new place.

She had to go off to join some friends for dinner (she had invited me along, but I'd begged off, in truth I was still feeling a bit ill and not up for eating more with my fake rubber tooth), so I made my excuses to give her time to get ready, and walked back to the Tube station, stopping in at the local Co-op to get some food for dinner. Really, anything soft will do at this point, I just wanted to get home and not have to chew anything!

Finally made it home, made some dinner, and then curled up into bed, wishing I get better soon!