In the morning, the Tall South African texted me at 7:30 AM to ask if I was really coming up there. Indeed, I assured him that I'd checked the train schedules the night before, and we agreed that I would try to come up there sometime after 11 AM. So after sleeping a bit more (it was too early to get up yet on a Sunday!), I showered, dressed, and made my way to King's Cross.
I caught the 10:58 train just in time, and the Tall South African called me to tell me to get off at Stevenage, where he would pick me up. After exiting the wrong side of the station, I found him, and we went for a little bit of a drive. It's funny, as he has to wear glasses to drive, but otherwise doesn't really wear them. Hence, kind of funny to see him in glasses. I know he wears them, and have seen him in them occasionally before, but it still strikes me as I'm not used to seeing them!
We just drove around for a bit (ostensibly we were looking for a tennis club), but mostly we just drove and talked. It was funny, because I'd had absolutely no plans coming up here, other than to hang out with him, yet I knew we didn't really need much of a plan beyond that. Things are always just so easy with him, that before long we were chatting and laughing as we always do. Plus, I'd kind of forgotten how much fun it is to just drive sometimes, chatting over the radio, and talking the way you do on long car trips. I had to admit as well, even though he went quite fast on the motorways, he IS a good driver, which was sort of reassuring.
We took a brief driving tour of Letchworth, and then parked the car in Hitchin and got out to go for a walk. We found that his favourite restaurant (which he's told me about before, "Just Desserts") was open, so we stopped in for a bite to eat. The place is true to its name, in that it only serves desserts, so although it was my breakfast, I had a mint chocolate chip sundae, which was really delicious.
We then went on a little hike up a hill in a park, where we just talked about some of his antics in high school, which really had me shaking my head. I know if he tells me these things, they must be true, yet he's always so sweet and nice with me, that I just can't quite believe it. Tales of sleeping with three girls at the same time, sneaking into all-girls common rooms, and quite frankly just being more than a bit manipulative with women to get his way with them. And why did he do all of these things? He shrugged his shoulders and said, "Because I could." I know he isn't proud of it, but the truth is, he probably could get away with it all...
The skies started to cloud over, so he insisted that we go back to the car. He really timed it perfectly, as just as we drove out of the parking lot, rain drops started to fall. We went back to his house, which was a charming, if standard, suburban row house. It had the most gorgeous kitchen though, which I don't think he fully appreciates!
His entire family was down in Cornwall on a camping trip, which is why he was in the house by himself and a bit bored. I asked him if he felt left out, to not be going with them, and we had an odd conversation about how the rest of his family is very close to one another, but he's always felt a bit like the black sheep, the odd one out.
So we hung out at his house for a bit, drinking Pimms without fruit, watching some of the Olympics on television, and doing nothing much, but still having a fabulous time. Just a lazy Sunday, avoiding the thunderstorms, but enjoying it nonetheless. I was enjoying seeing where he lived so much, I imagined how much fun it would be to take him to New York sometime, something I hope I get a chance to do someday.
The Young Dutchman called me, wanting to get my feedback on his thesis, and I think was surprised to learn that I was spending the day with the Tall South African. I never talk to the Young Dutchman much about the Tall South African, as I don't think he likes knowing that there's another important boy in my life. The Tall South African, for his part, knows that I'm close to the Young Dutchman, and hence I think saw that confirmed with the Young Dutchman's constant pestering of me..
After this, the Tall South African missed a call from The Girl, although just turned it off and said he'd call her later. We talked a bit about her, this girl who he's been friends with for years, who he's been trying to have a dating relationship with for a few months now. The one thing I sort of wanted to point out to him was something I knew he already knew: If he had the house to himself, why was I the girl up visiting him, not his girlfriend? And it's that weird sinking feeling you have, when you know something isn't going to work out for someone, but yet you try to pretend it's all fine.
Because after listening to the Tall South African talk about this girl, I realised it would be the equivalent of me trying to date the Young Dutchman. And on one level, everyone probably assumes that our relationship would run incredibly smoothly, for he's one of my best friends in the world, who I practically take for granted, as I know how much he adores me. And yet, I would (just the way this girl the Tall South African is with) always assume that he was going to cheat on me. What would be the only way to reassure me, to establish that trust? Well, it would be to spend lots of time together. And yet, this girl never goes to see the Tall South African, they don't sleep together, and at this point he hadn't seen her in over three weeks. Even worse, she's so self-concious about her body, she won't even let him see her without her clothes on until she's lost another 5 kilos. Which of course, he could care less about. I want him to be happy, yet the writing is just there on the wall for all to see. Maybe things will change, but I just think when I compare how easy things are with the two of us, and how much he struggles with this girl, I wanted to ask, "Doesn't something seem wrong here to you?"
When the skies cleared, we took a walk down to his local pub, splitting a bottle of wine out in the back garden and just chatting more. Originally he'd said that we could have that one bottle, and that would be it, but somehow when it came time to walk into town, we stopped at another pub, and got another bottle. He was so distracted by his phone that I stole it from him for a bit, and continued to ramble on as we discussed, life, emotions, and grand plans.
Then, he got a call from his friend Troy, who was out with his girlfriend, and when he handed the phone over to me, I managed to convince them to come out and join us for a drink. Which they did, and then we ended up at another pub, until it was quite obvious that the Tall South African and I were in no state to even walk home, so Troy drove us back to the Tall South African's place.
At which point it was also stupidly obvious that there was no way I was going to make it back to London that night. So the Tall South African went to work in the kitchen, making up an apple crumble that I had to admit was amazingly good for drunken cooking, and then decided to put me in his brother's room. (I wondered why not just crash with him, until I saw that he had a single bed. Yup, there is no way either of us would get any sleep if we tried that!)
So he put me in that room, and when I asked for something to sleep in, he took off his own shirt and handed it directly over to me. Which I then found a bit strange, as he just kept standing there with his shirt off, so I guessed there was nothing to do but change right in front of him. Yet when I did the usual dance that girls do, getting their bra off under their shirt, he laughed and asked, "What is it with you girls always trying to be so modest? It's not like I haven't seen you naked before..." True, so at that point I just gave up and stripped down right in front of him. Such a strange relationship we have!
I crashed into his brother's bed (when was the last time I slept in a single bed?) and was sound asleep pretty quickly, but after an incredibly fun day!
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