Mother Goose

This evening was the "Mother Goose" run of the hash, where everyone was supposed to dress up as characters from nursery rhymes. I had always planned on skipping this evening's run, because I didn't want to pay £5 for a run that I thought wouldn't be much good, and the rain and cold weather further put me off. Still, I needed to give a cheque to Caroline, so I showed up after the run was over. I was feeling pudgy and sluggish after so much eating out for the Thanksgiving week while everyone was here, but managed to cobble together an outfit that I didn't look too terrible in.

When I arrived, people weren't yet back from the run, but I didn't have to wait too long before the crowds started streaming in. Oxford Boy was there (wearing a ridiculous little Bo-Peep outfit), but I actually found myself getting drawn in conversation with Nobby's Nuts, who insisted on buying me a drink. As a result, I ended up chatting with him for a bit, and ended up making my way around the room quite a bit before I found myself in conversation with Oxford Boy. After a bit, he pondered where the bulk of the group was, and told me that we needed to go downstairs to find the others. I wondered if by "we" he meant for me to join him, or if it was just a figure of speech. So I waited for him to move off for a bit, but as he reached the bottom of the first flight of stairs he looked back at me to see if I was coming with him, so I took that as a "yes". I guess we're a team again tonight...

Then again, maybe not. When we got downstairs, he pretty quickly introduced me to a random new runner, whose first time it had been tonight. I didn't quite get it, thinking, "Now you're pawning me off on other people?" But hey, the new guy was rather cute and obviously needed somebody to talk to, so I just went with it. Turns out this was the guy who was sub-letting Tara's flat and living with Blunder, and so had come along at Blunder's invitation. The guy had a girlfriend (pity!) but seemed nice enough, if a touch on the dim side. Still, fine conversation for the evening and I felt good for being welcoming to a newbie.

I lost track of him after a while (I think I started talking to Princess), and then found my way back into conversation with Oxford Boy for a bit. I found myself telling him stories of having everyone in town this past week for Thanksgiving, and of going to the American Thanksgiving service at St. Paul's. Which made him ask me if I were a religious person, and he seemed pleased by my answer that I do go to church semi-regularly. Back to when he once told me he was "very" Catholic, which I don't quite jive with, but perhaps just being religious is good enough for him...

I then thought a bit about the advice I'd read of praising guys more instead of always playing it cool around them, and so knowing his vanity, when the conversation turned to where I live in Shepherd's Bush, I told him I remembered that run because he showed up in a suit and looked so dashing in it, I would always remember it. It must have been the right move, because he seemed absolutely delighted, not embarrassed at all but just thrilled to be told that. I guess we all need a little ego boost at times, and this boy definitely enjoyed getting one from me.

I then spent some time trying to chat with Caroline, but everyone kept interrupting us, until finally the pub was closing and a group of us all left to walk to the pub. Caroline and a few others went to Leicester Square, while Oxford Boy, Princess, Hangover and others went to Picadilly Circus.

As we walked towards Picadilly Circus, Oxford Boy wrapped an arm around me, holding me close to him as we walked. I couldn't quite do the same due to his backpack on his back (it made for an awkward reach-around), so I reached up and took his hand as it rested on my shoulder. Very sweet and good company. We walked to the Tube that way until we got through the barriers and had to say good-bye to Princess. At which point I gave Princess my usual kiss on the lips, and then began an absolutely hilarious sequence where Princess was chasing Oxford Boy around attempting to kiss him on the lips as well. I was absolutely doubled over, gasping with laughter, as Oxford Boy laughingly yelled out, "No! I'm too close to being gay!" Oh my gosh, you know those instances where you're worried that you're laughing so hard you might actually die because you can't breathe? It was that funny, it was killing me...

Oxford Boy and I then went down to our trains together, and had to split at the north-south platform divide as we were going the opposite way. He gave me a hug and a kiss, and said that we needed to go clubbing sometime. Ah, so perhaps we're back on to hanging out on our own again?

The next night Caroline actually caught me online, bemoaning how nobody had left us alone, as she'd wanted to ask my opinion on something. She said, "So I know you and Oxford Boy are quite good friends....has he said to you at all how he might feel about me? The background is that we went out one night a few weeks back, got very drunk and ended up kissing while singing kareoke. It wasn't much of a kiss, just a little one, and since then we've met up a few times but nothing happened. I figured we both kinda had a silent but mutual understanding that we were just friends, until he asked me out for dinner the other night, which just confused me. I don't know whether it's just him being friendly or more....?!"

Interesting detail, although I replied to her with absolute honesty, which is that I thought Oxford Boy is a boy, and as such doesn't have any game plan. He asked her to dinner because he was having fun. He wanted to go clubbing with me for the same reason. There is no deeper message, it's just a lack of impulse control. I explained to her that he's like a puppy, and while one shouldn't throw fake balls for puppies that confuse them (that's just mean), it's fine to pat a puppy on the head and be nice to it, even if you have no intention of playing fetch for hours with it. Puppy does not need to sit in a corner just because you don't want to play ball. But all the puppy is thinking about is, "Will you play fetch with me?" Puppies aren't looking for much more than that, or having many more deep-seated thoughts.

I talked to her as well about just understanding what motivates men, and realising you can't change it, but just have to work with it. To which she replied, "How are you single with insight like that? I mean that's insight women works for months and years to gain!!!" Gosh, if only I knew, my dear...

That night when I arrived home, I found myself chatting online with a friend from high school, who has just gotten divorced from her husband, and is already seeing someone else. She caught me online and asked, "Question: If you go on 4 lunch dates, one movie date, 2 dinner dates,join someone for Turkey Day w/ a lot of friends and hang out at night at bars and clubs together, does that mean you are dating?" Ummm, I'd say it does, so I asked her the basics: "Has he kissed you?" Oh yes, a lot. Okay then, I'd say it's a dating relationship, even if it isn't a boyfriend-girlfriend thing quite yet... How does she move that quickly, when I can't seem to get any boys to kiss me these days?

Admittedly, when I made one little mention that I'd been out with the Friend from Kindergarten over the weekend (having gone to high school with us, she knows both of us and sees us frequently when she's in London), she instantly butted in with, "You two should date already!" And to be fair, I occasionally think about it. But it's almost back to what I was telling Caroline: You can't change men, you have to accept them as they are. And along with the incredible intelligence, wit, curiosity, loyalty and understanding of where I come from, do I also want to take on the refusal to go anywhere you can't wear trainers, the almost scary gambling, the height obsession and the incredible "guy-ness"? And as I said to her, I have no idea how on earth to suddenly change the relationship I've had with someone since I was four years old. I guess I just keep hoping life will work out the way it's meant to work out. With a new guy or with the guy I've known since I was four. We'll see.

But she left me with her parting advice, "I was not attracted to the ex-hubby in the way I should have been, and it is amazing finding people to be truly attracted to." Food for thought.